Chronically Caroline

image1

Well hello there! Happy first day of fall! I feel like it’s been a while since I sat down to chat you with guys. This is going to be a little update on my life and where I’m headed. As some of you may recall, I’ve experienced health issues over the past few years. My condition has recently worsened, which I discussed in my previous post, “The Girl in the Wheelchair Just Stood Up”.

A few weeks ago, I flew out to Rochester, Minnesota to have a series of tests done at the Mayo Clinic. I was there for about a week of testing. Although some of the tests were borderline unbearable, I must say that my experience at the Mayo Clinic could not have gone more smoothly. Every doctor I met with genuinely cared about what they do and took the time to explain things thoroughly. That was something that I really appreciated.

To keep it short, I was diagnosed with Fibromyalgia in addition to my existing diagnosis of POTS (Postural Orthostatic Tachycardia Syndrome). If you aren’t familiar with Fibromyalgia, it’s basically widespread muscle pain.

The doctor I saw at the Mayo Clinic in Rochester recommended that I complete their three week pain management/rehabilitation program. Of course, three weeks sounds like a long time. However it doesn’t compare to being chronically ill for months upon months.

As I discussed in my last post, my condition essentially forced me to withdraw from the college of my dreams and caused me to become wheelchair bound. I’m slowly getting back onto my feet; now I’m even working for Ted Baker part time! I could not be happier with my decision to start this blog a year ago. I can’t believe where it’s taken me in such a short time and I’m excited for what’s to come.

These past 8 months or so have been quite the bump in the road for me. They’ve really taught me the clichés – don’t give up, keep a positive attitude…etc. As usual, I want to emphasize the power of kindness. There are millions of people in this world who are just like me. We have “silent illnesses”. We look fine from the outside; we may even appear to be happy! But we’re suffering inside and if this isn’t something that you experience personally, you’ll never fully understand.

Social media can be beyond deceiving, especially in my case. Yes, I post 2-3 outfits a week. You may think that I was out with friends having a good time and just snapped a few shots. In reality, I dragged myself to get ready, drove somewhere close with my mom, she took the photos quickly and we went back home so that I could rest.

Most days I wake up and feel like complete shit. I kind of feel like I have an awful hangover. I have a headache, I’m nauseated and my whole body is so stiff that I feel like I could shatter. Maybe after being upright for a little while, my legs will give out and I’ll fall. Now I eat something and I’m on my way to work in my VW Beetle. A few morons try to run me off the road; I assume because they’re jealous of my darling little ’03 beetle. I get to work and park in a handicapped spot. Some lady has the audacity to say something to me about not needing the handicapped parking spot. Hopefully I’m feeling extra kind that day and I’ll just swallow my pride and ignore her… but you never know!

Anyway, those are just a few of the frustrations I experience day to day. As for now, I’ll be starting the three week rehabilitation program in mid October at Mayo’s Florida location. I’m really looking forward to it. If all goes well, I hope to move back to NYC this coming January and finally get my life back.

Lastly, I just want to thank my parents for helping me through every step. I don’t know where I’d be without either of them. Remember that small act of kindness will go a long way; make someone smile today.

3 Comments
  1. Hi Caroline, this is the first time I’m reading your blog. Thank you for posting this. I’m very inspired and encouraged by reading this. And I’m so happy you’re getting the help you need.

    I had fibromyalgia from 2009-2011 and suffered terribly but now I’ve got it under control. I only feel very fatigued and mostly pain free these days, which is a blessing.

    I’m a fashion stylist and it’s a challenge to keep progressing but I keep moving forward anyway and I do what I can when I’m able.

    Anyway, I wish you the very best and pray you will get better with time. Take care.

    Peace

    1. Hi Leah!

      Thanks so much for your kind words. I’m glad to hear that your condition has improved and that you have things under control! Have a wonderful week.

      xoxo,
      Caroline Renae

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.

You may use these HTML tags and attributes: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <s> <strike> <strong>